First time a student of mine sold her own work, and it was not to her family
One of the girls who comes to my house on Sundays to learn, Sunita, she is maybe seventeen. She has been coming since two years, very quiet, never asking anything, only watching my hand when I draw the line for the fish scales. Her lines were shaky for long, I will not lie.
Last month there was a small exhibition at the block office in Madhubani, arranged by the cooperative. She sent two paintings without telling me. I came to know only when the secretary phoned me. Both were sold. One to a teacher from Darbhanga, one to a man who works in the bank there.
She came on Sunday and put the money in her mother's hand, and her mother did not say anything for some time. I have seen many paintings go from my own house to the walls of people who will never know whose hands made them. But this is different. It is her own money from her own line work.
I told her, now you must be regular in practice, this is only starting. But inside I was thinking of my mother, who taught me in the same way, sitting on the floor with the bamboo stick for the brush. Nothing has changed in that room since long. Only the names are new.
She is asking me now whether she can learn to do the kohbar on cloth, not only paper. I said yes but cloth is costly and one mistake cannot be removed. Any of you have experience teaching a young student on cloth? I do not want to discourage her by being too careful also.
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The part that stays with me is that she sent them without telling you. That is the actual win. Students who wait for the teacher's blessing stay students. She didn't need the blessing and she didn't need the money to come from an aunt who felt obliged. A teacher from Darbhanga and a bank clerk bought them because they wanted the line on the wall.
I had a boy once who did something similar, hung two pieces in a village hall show behind my back. I was annoyed for about a day, then I understood the annoyance was mine to keep quiet about. Your Sunday has been working better than you knew. Tell her the fish scales are hers now.
The annoyance is the interesting part. You spend years teaching someone to see, and then they see something without asking you first, and for a day it feels like a small betrayal. Then you realize you are just grieving the end of being needed. That is the job working.
I had the same with a student who welded a piece of mine into her own work without saying. I was insulted. Then I looked at it properly and she had used it better than I did.
You are correct ji, the grieving of being needed is exactly it. For one day I was thinking she has done wrong by not telling me, and then I felt ashamed of myself, because what she did was the whole point of the teaching, no? Your welding student used your piece better than you did, that is a good line. I only hope Sunita will also do better than me one day, then my work is finished properly.
You are right ji, the annoyance was mine to keep quiet about, and I did keep it. But I will tell you honestly, that day I also felt a little proud of my own annoyance, if that makes sense, because it showed me I had taught her something to be thrown away. Your boy hanging two pieces behind your back, that is the same thing. He was not hiding from you, he was only not waiting for you. There is a difference and it took me some days to see it.