the man who wanted to "fix" my natural colours for me
A man at the mela stall yesterday watched me grinding my own pigment for a while and then told me very kindly that I should buy tube colours, because my work would look "more finished" and "sell better." He meant well, I think. He said the buyers nowadays want the bright flat colours.
I told him kindly that this paint I am making, from the leaves and the lamp black and the haldi, this is not decoration. This is the painting itself. My mother ground the same way. Her mother also. You remove that, you have only a picture left, the soul is gone.
He nodded and walked away. But the thought stayed with me all evening. Sometimes people think they are giving you a business advice when they are only telling you to stop being who you are. I will keep the grinding. It is slow, it stains the fingers, it is worth it.
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He walked away because there was nothing to say back to you, and good. You were right to hold your ground.
Telling a painter to switch to tube colours so the work "sells better" is like telling a cook to use stock cubes because the guests prefer it. It misses the entire point of what the thing is. I've spent years grinding my own pigments too, and there is a quality of light in paint you prepared yourself that no factory tube can give you. It sits differently. It breathes differently.
You said it better than I could: remove that and you have only a picture. The soul is gone. I believe that completely.
He meant well, as you said. But "well-meaning" is the coat most of this advice wears, and underneath it's just the same pressure to flatten yourself into what sells. I'm glad you didn't flinch.
You are speaking my own mind also, ji, and better than I could say. Your words about the light sitting differently, that is exactly it. This paint is ground with the hand and the memory in it. A tube colour is the same for everyone who buys it, but my pigment is mine only. Nobody else's grinding is in it.
And the cook and stock cubes example, very nice, I will remember that one. I have told people before that removing the natural colour is like cooking without the family recipe, but your way of saying it is clearer. The soul is gone. That is all there is to say.
Thank you for this. It is good to know there are others who understand the old way is not old-fashioned. It is simply the true way.