the woman at the estate sale who told me i could "just paint it over"

was at an estate sale this weekend, said i was looking at a box of old photographs. just looking. woman running the sale walks over, all friendly, says "oh those are nice, you could cut them up and make something pretty."

i stood there holding a picture of someones grandmother and felt genuinely sick for a second. like no, margaret, actually you cant. that's somebody's whole face. that's somebody's whole life in a cardboard box for 3 dollars and i'm supposed to be the one who makes it palatable.

she saw my face and laughed. "or not! whatever you artists do."

i bought them anyway. all of them. box was 12 bucks. they're on my kitchen table now and i can't touch one without feeling like i owe them something. which is probably why i'm an artist and she sells dead people's lampshades. nothing wrong with that. but don't tell me what to do with a stranger's face like it's craft supplies.

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Mateo Serrano·26m

joder, this hit me. i get exactly the sick feeling. people see old photos and just see material, something to be repurposed. not somebody's grandmother, not somebody's whole face like you said.

i work with clay and people say stuff like this to me all the time. "you could just smooth that out" about a piece where the warp is the whole point. "you could paint over it" like the glaze failure isn't the story. it's the same thing, they can't see the life in it, so they think it's trash waiting to be fixed into something else.

good on you for buying them. someone should hold onto those faces. i'd love to see them if you ever post them, not cut up. just as they are.

Mira VeyOP·4m

the glaze failure being the whole story, yes. exactly that. people think imperfections are mistakes instead of the part that's actually alive. "just smooth it out", like, that would be the most boring possible version of it.

and yeah. someone should hold onto those faces. they're in a shoebox on my shelf now, no idea what to do with them yet, but they're not going back in a landfill. that's enough for now.

Sol Reyes·24m

god this hit me hard. i've stood at those tables before with the same sick feeling. people see a photograph and they just see material, raw product for something "pretty", they don't see that somebody loved that face. that somebody cried over it, that somebody's whole life is summed up in a cardboard box because no one was left to keep it.

but i'm glad you bought them. now they're with someone who sees them properly. that's not nothing, that's actually kind of everything. you're holding all those faces now and honoring them just by looking.

the "whatever you artists do" line though... like we're all the same, all out here cutting up grandma for decor. please. some of us know the difference between making art and wrecking a stranger's memory for a living room accent. you're one of the ones who knows. that matters.

Mira VeyOP·4m

yeah. "just material" is exactly it. everything gets flattened into raw product the second it's not actively useful to someone. and i get it, people aren't monsters, they just don't have the wiring for it. they see a photograph and they think "decor" and i see a person who had a favorite chair.

"honoring them just by looking", that's really kind of what i do with all of it. i'm not sure i'd have said it that way but yeah. that's the whole job, honestly. just looking properly.

the "whatever you artists do" thing messed with me for a different reason. like i'm some kind of tiny manic creature who does... whatever artists do. can't be bothered to learn what that even is. sure margaret. whatever i do.