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i built these three little heads last month, all from the same lump of clay, and i swear they were meant to be the same face. same pinch, same eye sockets, same mouth line. open the kiln this morning and two of them have the mouth pulled open like they're saying something, and the third one looks like it's asleep. same clay. same firing. i did nothing different and the kiln decided they were three different people. my grandmother came by and said the two open ones look like they're arguing with each other, which is fair, they do. now i have to price them and i don't know if i can sell the argument. it's mine now, in a way the sleeping one isn't. anyway the glaze crawled off one of the chins, so there's also that. friday.

I had a show last November. Sixteen paintings, two months of work, the usual opening-night crowd, wine, awkward conversations, people stepping close to a canvas and then stepping back. Zero sales that night. Not one red dot. I stood by the door and watched people leave and thought, well, that's that. Next morning I had three emails. A critic from a local paper, a blogger I'd never heard of, and someone from a small museum in Chemnitz. All of them had been there. All of them wrote something. The museum person asked for a studio visit. The sales came later, slowly, over months, to people who'd read those pieces and then come to the gallery on a quiet Tuesday afternoon. I'm not saying openings are useless. But the thing I thought was a failure, the empty ledger from that night, turned out to be the most valuable part. The people who write are never the people who buy on the spot. They're the ones who need to sit with it, go home, think, and then tell someone else. I still hate the feeling of an opening where nothing moves. But I've stopped reading it as a signal.

sent some work to a group show a few years back, first time in a real gallery. showed up to the opening excited as hell and stood by my pieces for like an hour and maybe two people even looked at them. everyone else was networking and drinking free wine and i just stood there feeling like a ghost in my own art. i know openings are weird and half the people are just there to be seen but man it stung. made me wonder if the work even mattered or if it was just about who you know. anyone else have an opening or show where you felt completely invisible? how'd you handle it? i just left early and sulked lol

almost didnt open the email, it was buried in promotions. an actual juried gallery open call, and they want to see THREE pieces from me. me. ive spent so long assuming these things are for other people, the ones with the right degrees and the right contacts. im submitting tonight before i talk myself out of it. wish me luck, or talk me out of the spiral, whichever one you think i need more

Okay so I'm about 8 months into doing this full time and I've sent maybe 15 cold emails to galleries and gotten exactly one reply, which was a no, but a NICE no, and honestly I printed it out?? haha. Here's my actual question: how did you get your first gallery to even open the email. Not the whole relationship, just the door cracking. Did you walk in with work under your arm? Did you know somebody? Did you go to an opening and corner the owner (respectfully)? Did you just send 60 emails until one landed? My own answer: the one no I got came from a gallery I'd actually been to in person first, stood in front of a painting for way too long, and then emailed saying I'd seen the show and here's my work and it might sit next to this one artist's stuff. That's the only one that ever answered me. So now I'm convinced showing up in person actually matters and I want to know if that's real or if I just got lucky once. Tell me yours. Especially if it was dumb or accidental, those are my favorite ones.

There is a glass jar in the corner of the studio, lid rusted shut, full of bolts I pulled off a collapsed fence in Žižkov maybe six years ago. I have moved it four times. Never opened it. Today I needed one M8 and I stood there with the jar in my hands for a long minute and put it back. The thing is the fence is gone. Demolished, flats there now, expensive ones. So those bolts are the only part of it left that exists anywhere, and every time I take one out for some stupid bracket I am spending it. Down to a finite number of that afternoon. I know how this sounds. I have told younger artists for years that material is material and hoarding it is just fear wearing a nice coat. Then I keep a jar of bolts I will not open because of a fence. Practical question underneath it though, and I genuinely do not have the answer: when do you decide a saved thing has become the work itself and not the supply for it? Because I am fairly sure this jar is now a piece and I have been calling it inventory.

Found a box in the back of the closet today. Ex's stuff, the stuff I couldn't give to Goodwill after we split. Not sentimental stuff either, a cracked lamp he fixed twice, a stack of his old field guides, some cassette tapes. Four years and I still can't bring myself to open it, let alone get rid of it. Weird part is I don't miss him. The marriage was done long before the divorce was. But that box is the one thing I won't touch. I make work about objects carrying weight and here I am with a literal box of dead weight I'm too chicken to deal with. Maybe it becomes a piece someday. Maybe that's the only way I let myself look at it.

opened the kiln today and one of the bowls came out looking like a sad potato with a face. i didn't even put a face on it, the glaze just decided that's what it was going to be. i'm honestly keeping it. it's the most honest piece i've made in weeks. everyone talks about the beautiful surprises from firing but nobody mentions the ones where the kiln just insults you. like thanks, i know i slipcast that badly, you didn't have to make it look embarrassed about it too. putting the potato out at the market next sunday with a little sign. "face not intended." see if anyone bites.

I had my first open studio thing this weekend, just me, my little apartment studio, some snacks I burned slightly, and like 30 people who actually showed up which still feels insane. And this woman came in, didn't say much, walked around for a while looking at everything. She kept coming back to this one painting I almost didn't hang because I thought it was too quiet, just a corner of my kitchen window with the light hitting the sill at that golden hour angle. I'd painted it like six times trying to catch it right. She came up to me at the end and said it reminded her of her grandmother's kitchen in Poland and she couldn't stop staring at it. And then she bought it. And then she cried a little when she was writing the check, said she hadn't seen her grandmother in eight years. I didn't know what to do with that honestly. I just stood there holding the cash like a complete idiot. My partner had to nudge me to say thank you properly haha. I think I forget sometimes that the paintings leave me and go live in other people's lives and mean things I'll never fully know. That's kind of terrifying and lovely at the same time. Anyway the burned snacks were a hit somehow so I guess I'll keep burning them on purpose.

I still get a little annoyed thinking about this. Had a gallery interested in showing some of my landscapes a couple years back, which felt huge for me at the time. Then in the conversation they mentioned I'd be expected to cover the catering for the opening night. Not split, not share, me, fully. I was so flattered by the offer I almost said yes before common sense kicked in. What's the weirdest thing a gallery has asked you to pay for or provide? I want to know if the wine thing is actually normal somewhere or if I was right to walk.

This one still makes me laugh. Years ago, a small gallery in Athens said yes to showing my work, then hit me with a list of costs I'd need to cover, including the wine for opening night. Like I was supposed to hand over cash so people could get drunk looking at my mosaics. I said no, and the show fell through. I know the line between a fair split and getting taken advantage of gets blurry sometimes, especially when you're starting out and just want someone to say yes. So where's the line for you? What's the thing a gallery asked for that made you walk, or should have made you walk?

Early in my career, a decent gallery in a decent city offered me a solo show. Then quietly mentioned I'd be covering the opening, drinks, food, printed invites, the whole thing. I was young and hungry so I said yes. Spent half the sale before the work sold. Told myself it was normal. It wasn't. What's the most creative expense a gallery has tried to push onto you? I'll start: someone once asked me to pay for the insurance on the venue, not the work. The venue.

Got asked to do a live demo at a gallery opening in Athens next month. They said "the guests would love to watch you work." I said do you know what mosaic looks like in real time? Because I sit on a pillow on the floor and cut one piece of stone at a time and stare at it for ten minutes before I set it. That's a Tuesday. It's not performance, it's just slow. They said it's fine, people find it meditative. We'll see. Anyone else get asked to turn their studio practice into a show and find out it doesn't translate?

ok so i was talking to a gallery a few months back, small one, seemed nice, and then near the end they go "oh and we ask our artists to cover the opening drinks and food, about 200€, standard thing" and i just sat there like... is this standard??? i said i'd think about it and never wrote back. what's the wildest thing a gallery has tried to make you pay for? i need to know if i'm too suspicious or if that's actually crazy.

ok so my first ever "opportunity", a small gallery, kinda run down, I was so excited I'd have said yes to anything. and they wanted ME to cover the opening night drinks. like hundreds of dollars for wine for strangers. I did it because I didn't know any better. 😭 what's the most ridiculous thing a gallery has tried to make you pay for? or asked you to provide that made you go... wait what. I need to know I'm not the only one who got played early on

Saturday, open studios, and I'm not paying attention because I'm talking to a man about his dead father's shed for twenty minutes. Turn around and there's a small bright green sticker on the lower corner of the big paper piece. Some kind of dinosaur. I left it. It's still on there. Two days now. Partly I'm annoyed. That's a piece I've been fighting since March, and now it's got a stegosaurus on it. Partly I think it's the only honest thing that happened in that room all day, because it was the one mark nobody was performing over. The kid saw a thing and stuck a thing to it and walked off. No statement, no price list, no explanation about tension and memory. The friend who helped me hang says take it off before the next thing. She's right, obviously. I just keep not doing it. Anyone else had their work improved by someone under the age of six

open studio was saturday. sold three things which, for a saturday in a converted warehouse with bad lighting and worse parking, is basically a miracle. but the thing i keep thinking about is this woman who came in around two, bought a small one, came back at four and bought another, then asked if i'd take a deposit and three payments for one of the big ones. i said yes immediately and then felt weird about it after. like did i just undercut myself? is this a bad precedent? am i a bank now? the whole drive home i argued with myself. and then i remembered being 24 and putting a $200 print on a credit card i couldn't pay off for a year. so. idk. i think i did the right thing and i also think i'm going to be chasing an email for six weeks. anyway the real win is that i stopped saying "no pressure" every time someone looked at a painting. that reflex is a disease

Curious how people here actually got in. My first real interest came from a small space in the 6th that I'd walked past a hundred times. I didn't email. I brought two small panels in person on a Tuesday afternoon, when the gallerist was alone and bored, and we ended up talking about light for an hour before I mentioned the paintings at all. That's how it started. Nothing since has worked that way. So what was it for you. Cold email, open call, someone's cousin, a walk-in with work under your arm. And did it feel like luck or a move you made on purpose.

Honest one. My first gallery, years ago, the owner asked me at the opening what my prints were about and I gave her the whole thing, the multiple, the copy, Benjamin, the whole architecture. She nodded for maybe ninety seconds and then said "so, they are nice, but what are they about?" I still think about that. She was not wrong to ask and I was not wrong to answer, but I had planned the answer and not the room. Lately I try a version that is one sentence and then I stop talking, which for me is a discipline. What is yours? The real one you say out loud, not the one on the website. And does it change depending on who is asking, the gallerist, the collector, the other artist in the corner? I want to know if anyone has cracked this or if we are all just improvising badly.

I finally sat down and looked at where last year's sales actually came from. Three paintings, all three to people who had seen the work in person first: one at a two-day botanical illustration symposium in Asheville, two through my open studio weekend in October. Not one sale came from anything I posted. Not one. Meanwhile I've spent a year learning how to shoot vertical video, which I am not good at and do not enjoy, and I'm reasonably sure I've converted the account into an audience of people who like watching paint dry in the literal sense. They came for the process and they are not buyers. That's not a complaint about them. It's a complaint about me not noticing for twelve months. What I have not worked out is whether the online thing is genuinely wasted effort or just too slow to measure, and I suspect nobody can actually tell me. The symposium cost me a table fee, four nights in a hotel, and a week of framing, and it paid for itself in the first hour. I'm keeping the account. I've stopped pretending it's a shop.