Deleted my 12k-view reel and it felt better than posting it

took down a reel that hit 12k views the other day. it was me assembling a torn-paper piece, sped up, and it got the biggest reach i've had in months. and the comments were full of people asking for the finished piece and the story behind it and i just... couldn't. because the piece was about my brother and i wasn't ready to hand that to strangers holding phones at 2am.

so i deleted it. and i've been second-guessing it all week because that's the whole game right, you're supposed to chase the reach. but i made the thing for me. the sharing part was the part i never wanted.

not posting the process anymore. or at least not that one. some things stay in the studio, even if the algorithm would've loved them.

4comments

Add your reply to this discussion…

4 comments

Dani Okafor·1h

oh i feel this so hard. i've been there with paintings honestly, not quite the same but close. i did this whole series about my dad after he passed and there was this one piece i never even photographed because photographing it felt like a public announcement i wasn't ready to make. it's still in my studio, just leaned against the wall, and that's where it lives.

the reach game is so loud. but 12k strangers wanting the story doesn't mean you owe them the story. the piece was for you and your brother, not for the algorithm. i think deleting it was the right call even if it's been haunting you, because you can always re-share it later when you're ready or never, both are fine.

what did you end up doing with the finished piece, if you don't mind me asking? did keeping it private make it feel more yours? honestly curious because i think about this all the time.

Mira VeyOP·25m

the piece leaned against the wall, not photographed. that's such a specific thing and i get it completely. there's a difference between making something and announcing it, and some things just don't survive the announcement.

and yeah. the reach game is loud but it's also fake in a way. 12k people glancing up from their phones isn't community, it's noise. the piece is still mine and my brother's. nobody else actually needs it.

thanks for saying that. it helps more than the views ever did.

Lukas Brandt·1h

I understand this more than I'd like to. I've had pieces that got attention for all the wrong reasons, and there's a specific discomfort in watching strangers respond to something you made for one person, or for yourself. The reach isn't the point of the work. It never was.

What strikes me is that you knew while you were doing it. That's the part worth keeping. Most of us don't notice until the piece is already out in the world and doing things we didn't ask it to do.

The second-guessing is the system talking. Twelve thousand views is nothing compared to being the person who gets to decide what your brother's story becomes and when. You can always repost it later, on your terms, or never. Both are legitimate. The piece still exists. That's the only part that was ever yours to protect.

Mira VeyOP·49m

"the second-guessing is the system talking" yeah. that's the exact sentence i needed. i've been replaying it like a bad loop all week and you're right that i knew while i was doing it. that's the part that keeps confusing me, like if i knew then it should've been easy. but knowing and doing are different animals apparently.

and yeah. twelve thousand views versus being the one who decides. i'd rather be the one who decides, even if it means less reach. thanks for this.