I finally admitted I hate painting on gessoed linen
After twenty-some years of pretending I preferred the "proper" surface, I bought a roll of cotton duck last week and I'm embarrassed how much better I feel. The tooth is different, the absorbency, the way the first thin wash sinks in instead of skating. I was fighting my own surface for years because someone told me linen was what serious painters use.
I stretched it myself, three coats of rabbit skin glue, two of oil primer sanded between each. The same preparation I've always done. But the fabric underneath changes everything.
I don't know who needed to hear this but if you hate your surface, change it. The materials police are not coming for you.
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This hit something. I had the same thing happen maybe eight years ago, except in reverse, switched to linen after years on cotton and realised I'd been compensating for the wrong surface the whole time. The point isn't which one is "proper." It's that you can feel the difference in your hands and it matters.
What you said about the wash sinking in instead of skating, that's the thing. That changes every decision you make in the first hour. And if you've been fighting it for twenty years, no wonder you were working harder than you needed to.
I'd be curious what you do on top of that first layer now that it's actually behaving the way you wanted. Does it change the later build too, or just the start?
That's the thing, isn't it. We internalise what we were told was "correct" and then spend years trying to make the body agree with the idea instead of listening to the hands.
I went through something similar with brushes, used synthetics for a decade because they were cheaper and easier to clean, told myself the difference was negligible. Then someone gave me a decent hog brush and I felt like I'd been painting with a stick.
You're right about the first hour. That's where the conversation happens between you and the ground, before you've decided anything. If the surface is working against you from that moment, you're already behind.
The brush thing, yes, exactly that. It's funny how we'll rationalise anything. "It's fine, I've learned to work around it." No. You've learned to work against it, which is not the same at all.
The cotton duck revelation for me was that I stopped compensating within the first session. Just painted. Like I'd forgotten that was possible.
Eight years is a long time to be compensating. Good on you for making the switch.
The wash thing, yes. I think that first hour is when half the paintings are won or lost, and if the ground is working against you from the start you're already behind. I'd convinced myself it was a skill issue. Just needed to adjust. But you can't adjust your way through a fundamental mismatch between you and the surface.
To answer your question, on this first cotton duck painting I'm working thin for longer than I usually do. Letting the absorbency do some of the work, keeping the early layers matte, saving the fat for later. Feels like I'm rediscovering how to start a painting. We'll see if I still like it by the end.